Between the Random

Specialize in Your "Rut"

I remember the first time I thought I knew more than my mom.  I was like 6 years old.  I can actually remember thinking, "wow, I can't believe she doesn't know this."  So of course, in true know-it-all fashion, I took it upon myself to bestow my knowledge upon her.

And so it went well into my 20's.  It seemed the older they got, the less they knew.

My oldest son turns 6 years old next week.  Can you see where I'm going with this?!  Back at me.

Funny thing is, now that I'm middle-aged, I've discovered something that I truly did not expect. I was partially right when I was six!  It wasn't just adolescent arrogance!  I can't believe how many areas of my life I seem worse at than just a handful of years ago. 

I think I've become a worse driver - or so my wife tells me!  And I don't understand the new ways they're teaching math in school.  That's not the way we did it.

So given my recent decline in genius, I've been motivated to think more about this.  Here's what I've come up with.

As a kid, I didn't usually get to see my mom when she was in her element.  Most of the time I saw her when she was trying to enter my world.  Moms simply aren't very good at being teens.  But now, it's different. I've had opportunities to see my mom in her world now.  And she rocks.  It blows me away.  She's doing things I could never possibly do myself. 

And thus... my new theory.  I've come to believe that as I get older, I get much better at the things I'm good at, while the fringe becomes a casualty.  I'm becoming a specialist.  Even if my son thinks it's weird that I didn't know how to do something in his Webkinz account, I am refining the craft of entrepreneurship and marketing.  But he won't see that.

Some people call it a rut -- sticking to what you know and what you're good at.  I call it "specializing."  Though I can't recall the direct quote, I hold on to Peter Drucker's statement that it's not a good use of time working to become better in the areas of our weakness.  Rather we should focus on the areas of our strengths and outsource or partner in areas of weakness.

That might sound like an old man who doesn't want to change.  I think it sounds right on.  The tricky part is making sure we specialize in the right areas.  Lest we become out of touch.

I'm Ben. Not Brent.

Have you ever sat at the table with a Brent?  He's the guy at the table that gets all the laughs.  Seriously.  As soon as his mouth opens, people prepare to chuckle.

One day as I sat dazzled, I realized his trick.  He was genius at taking what someone else said and' making it so much better. Brent knew how to close the deal.

Yesterday, it hit me.  I'm not a Brent.  I'm the guy that gives Brent stuff that he can hit a home run with.  I come up with great stuff, but I need a Brent to make me better. 

This was a great moment of self discovery in knowing how I contribute best to a team.  When the brainstorming starts, my mind takes off.  I'm the first out of the gate.  This is one of the best ways I contribute to a team.

But more important than learning that I'm the first out of the gate was the realization that I need Brent to make me better.   And he probably needs me.  Now when I sit at the table with Brent, I look forward to how he will make my comment one that people will really laugh at. 

I think most self-starters aren't good at finishing the race alone.